10 1/2 hours of sleep.

I've never felt so refreshed ever since JC life started. It's amazing how JC life wears me out this terribly. Life's become like a broken record, it repeats all over and over again. Go to school, end of school, go home, do work, sleep and the next day you hope for something different but life never fails to disappoint you. 

What's worse. There are so many freaking distractions in school, it's kind of irritating. And I can't seem to concentrate in lectures no matter what. The only lectures I can pay attention in are the lectures when I happen to feel awake and feel like paying attention for some reason. 

And it's really frustrating to know that I have so many dreams I want to fulfill, and even though I know I need to study hard for these dreams to come true, my brain refuses to budge. I keep concentrating on things that are of no use in my life. 

That day, I was self analyzing why I can't seem to concentrate on my school work and stuff and came to this conclusion: That my social life wasn't stable enough for me to feel safe about yet. 

Anyone can say that that's an excuse I've come up with to defend myself, but really, that's true. I need to settle the social aspects of my life before I can move on in life. If I don't make a group of friends who I know I can trust entirely, if I don't make a group of friends who care genuinely for you, then I don't think I'll be able to move on in life. Really. I need friends who can make me feel like they'll never leave me. But now, the new friends I've made, just don't make me feel secure enough. I just don't feel like I'm not important to them?

Maybe it's just me.

Chem awaits. Bye.